Comments on: How to maintain a marriage through toddlerhood http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766 pictures and stories from the water's edge Tue, 22 Sep 2009 20:08:44 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: Victoria http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1733 Victoria Fri, 25 Mar 2005 16:28:16 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1733 Thank you for sharing the great marriage tips. As a former physician and mother of a 16-month old and a 4-year old, I agree that marriage can quickly go bad when parents are physically worn out for caring for the needs of little ones. But I figure that God made little ones so needy and He also knows that marriage is important so there must be solutions on how to manage it all. The answer is, as your post hints, that one can really only have two jobs during this time- being mommy and being wife- without risking some serious damage to the family unit. I speak from experience because I have tried a number of work-family arrangements. Now I work from home as a freelance writer and parenting coach but I have to admit that my first priority must be my family. In the weeks that my priorities shift more towards the work side of things, chaos ensues. This is despite the fact that my husband also works from home and is absolutely wonderful with caring for the kids and the house. Family life needs a lot of attention. I did not learn this until I had children. Are we going to do better teaching our children the truth? Thank you for sharing the great marriage tips. As a former physician and mother of a 16-month old and a 4-year old, I agree that marriage can quickly go bad when parents are physically worn out for caring for the needs of little ones.

But I figure that God made little ones so needy and He also knows that marriage is important so there must be solutions on how to manage it all.

The answer is, as your post hints, that one can really only have two jobs during this time- being mommy and being wife- without risking some serious damage to the family unit.

I speak from experience because I have tried a number of work-family arrangements. Now I work from home as a freelance writer and parenting coach but I have to admit that my first priority must be my family.

In the weeks that my priorities shift more towards the work side of things, chaos ensues. This is despite the fact that my husband also works from home and is absolutely wonderful with caring for the kids and the house.

Family life needs a lot of attention. I did not learn this until I had children.

Are we going to do better teaching our children the truth?

]]> By: Gene http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1732 Gene Tue, 22 Mar 2005 07:57:45 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1732 A very interesting post. Having gone through the experience of bringing up children when I look back the time spent with my kids was and continues to be the best time of my life. And it just goes by too fast. A very interesting post. Having gone through the experience of bringing up children when I look back the time spent with my kids was and continues to be the best time of my life. And it just goes by too fast.

]]> By: Betsy Devine http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1731 Betsy Devine Tue, 22 Mar 2005 06:32:53 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1731 Enoch is right that sharing the work is a love language too. In fact, just sharing the struggle to make marriage work is a good love language. Enoch is right that sharing the work is a love language too. In fact, just sharing the struggle to make marriage work is a good love language.

]]> By: enoch choi http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1730 enoch choi Mon, 21 Mar 2005 22:40:42 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1730 Betsy, i'm hoping that young wives feel loved and valued with the work that the young husbands are encouraged to provide... but i'm sure many women have a love language that is more verbal, or as you suggest more towards non-sexual physical affection. Betsy, i’m hoping that young wives feel loved and valued with the work that the young husbands are encouraged to provide… but i’m sure many women have a love language that is more verbal, or as you suggest more towards non-sexual physical affection.

]]> By: Betsy Devine http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1729 Betsy Devine Mon, 21 Mar 2005 22:32:14 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1729 Toddlerhood is hard, I remember it well. Our best trick was to hire a neighborhood teen to babysit every Thursday night. That meant we had to find something to do together outside the house every Thursday night, and many times we just went to Taco Bell followed by our neighborhood bookstore. Your friend's sex advice to young couples is very right about what young husbands need, but let me add the missing piece about what young wives need: the feeling that they're loved, respected, and valued. The needs of both can be met during intimate private time that includes lots of touching and loving to go with the sex. I read somewhere that 20 minutes of physical contact a day--hugging counts, even hugging while you're sleeping counts--is good for people and great for marriages. Toddlerhood is hard, I remember it well. Our best trick was to hire a neighborhood teen to babysit every Thursday night. That meant we had to find something to do together outside the house every Thursday night, and many times we just went to Taco Bell followed by our neighborhood bookstore.

Your friend’s sex advice to young couples is very right about what young husbands need, but let me add the missing piece about what young wives need: the feeling that they’re loved, respected, and valued. The needs of both can be met during intimate private time that includes lots of touching and loving to go with the sex. I read somewhere that 20 minutes of physical contact a day–hugging counts, even hugging while you’re sleeping counts–is good for people and great for marriages.

]]> By: enoch choi http://www.julieleung.com/archives/1766/comment-page-1#comment-1728 enoch choi Mon, 21 Mar 2005 20:08:10 +0000 http://www.julieleung.com/wordpress/?p=1766#comment-1728 you're sweet, Julie. after we wrote those posts, we chatted about both you and Katherine, how your posts are sweetened with a touch of grace that lightens this kind of tough stuff. can you believe we talked about this stuff with a senior MD of my group?!?! at a formal dinner? kinda crazy. That's how God is, he surprises you in the most unusual places ;) you’re sweet, Julie. after we wrote those posts, we chatted about both you and Katherine, how your posts are sweetened with a touch of grace that lightens this kind of tough stuff.

can you believe we talked about this stuff with a senior MD of my group?!?! at a formal dinner? kinda crazy. That’s how God is, he surprises you in the most unusual places ;)

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