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Connecting…and crying…

October 21st, 2004 · 2 Comments

I didn’t think I had much in common with Adam Curry. Years ago, we kids would sneak illicit glances at MTV when my mother wasn’t watching and sometimes we would get to see Adam’s Countdown show. He was working in a wondrous cool world soaring among rock stars while I was struggling to survive high school. That was the first time I was introduced to him: teenage me sitting on linoleum kitchen floor and he mtv god on the screen.

When Enoch posted from BloggerCon I that he was sitting next to Adam Curry, I followed the link and went to his site…that’s when I first saw Adam Curry’s blog

The other night, out of curiousity, I listened to Doug Kaye’s IT Conversations interview with Adam Curry. I had no idea how geeky a guy he was. It was great to hear him talk about his history and to fill in some of the details of his life.

What I liked hearing Adam talk about the most though were his feelings about his family. When he discussed the family’s decision to leave the States and return to Europe, he mentioned reasons that concerned his daughter. He wanted his girl to have a good education in Great Britain. He didn’t like the culture of suburban New Jersey where kids were left to fend for themselves. And he also said that he had missed a lot of his daughter’s life by being so busy with work.

I was impressed that this MTV-geeky guy was a dad, a regular dad who loved his daughter and wanted what was best for her. As a mom (of three girls), I felt I could understand and relate to his desires for his daughter. We had something in common.

Before today, I had listened to a couple of the mp3s Adam produced of his Daily Source Code and a couple of the ones he and Dave Winer have done together. My schedule during the days with my children doesn’t allow me many quiet moments to listen to podcasts.

Tonight though I had planned to work at my desk, so I thought I would listen to a few programs. I downloaded Adam’s daily source code from October 20th. As the podcast started, Adam began explaining what has been happening in his life and why he didn’t record a program the previous day. He said he had tried to record one but had started crying instead. And I too found myself crying as I listened.

Adam described how his mom has been diagnosed with lung cancer. My brother was diagnosed with cancer almost exactly five years ago today. I had forgotten the date, but as I listened to Adam, the memories returned immediately to mind. I still remember the phone call from my mom, telling me the news. I screamed loud, a scream of pain, a scream of denial, anger and sorrow. NO!

I’m so sorry for Adam’s mother and his family. As I listened to the rest of the podcast, I tried to do my duties at my desk and balance my checkbook but it was hard to pay attention to the numbers and push away the tears.

I know I’m crying for myself, remembering my brother’s battle with cancer. But I think too that I am crying for Adam and his family. Sympathy and sorrow. Shared suffering. Something inside me feels connected in a way I can’t deny or hide. I am sad and sorry.

Here I am sitting at my computer, staring at the screen, crying for someone I’ve never met, someone across the world from me in Amsterdam, someone who once seemed so different and distant.

Peace, hope and healing to you and your family, Adam.

Thank you for sharing with us.

I’ll be praying for you.

Tags: blog

2 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Adam Curry // Oct 21, 2004 at 10:49 am

    Hi Julie,

    Thank you so much for sharing. It really helps.


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