Lisa Williams posted today about blog widows (or widowers). I spied her entry early this morning and I’ve been thinking about it through the day…
… I have to say that is not the case for Ted and me. Blogging has brought us closer together. Sounds strange or sappy but it’s true. It’s a hobby and experience we have in common. We don’t have a lot of things we like to do together. We came into the marriage with many separate interests, and as I wrote a while back ( His and Her Blogs ), this has been a lot of fun for us.
Blogging has become part of our family conversations and culture – our young daughters can use the word “blog” correctly in sentences! – and we talk about what we’re reading, what’s happening, comments, posts, software etc… sometimes at the table during meals, and often during our time alone together at night.
In my weaker moments of our marriage, I confess I have felt jealous of computers, and how much attention they’ve received from Ted. But I’ve learned how to talk about it better with him. I’ve learned too that there are times that are more intense than others for him. I’d like to think that I’ve gained a little patience and understanding and lost a little of my insecurity (and a few of my fears). And now that I’m also blogging, as evident by my many posts, I spend quite a bit of my own time in front of a computer too. One night, when I was trying to hack my blog, as best I could (it felt to me like trying to play piano with a hammer), he came out and said it was a real role reversal to see me – instead of him – intensely focussed and frustrated, staring at a computer screen….
The fact though that both of us blog makes more the possibility of our children being blog orphans. I doubt we’ll have a blog widow or widower in this house, but I am concerned about the kids. Usually I only blog at night, or sometimes at nap time, when the kids are resting. But in the past week or two, when we’ve been on vacation, although staying at home, I’ve been using the computer a little more. Yesterday, I spent the afternoon “quiet time”, while the girls were resting in the living room the baby napping, writing some posts and emails. From my stool in the kitchen I could hear Abigail and Michaela in the other room talking “I blog about this..” “I blog about that…” They knew exactly what I was up to….I finished as quickly as I could so I could go read them each a story and play!
When Ted asked me if I wanted a card so I could sit in the living room and use the wifi network he set up recently, I said no. I regret that decision whenever Ted comes out after the girls bedtime and uses his laptop in the living room. That’s a lot more fun and interactive than when each of us is sitting at separate desks, separated by a wall as well.
But during the rest of the day, I don’t think I could use a computer. I wouldn’t feel right about sitting in the living room, children crawling all over me, and trying to write or even read blog posts. It’s not something I could or should do at this season of life.
Now I do like to write. I find many ideas floating through my mind during the day. Give me time and I’ll type it out, maybe even post a few:) And I enjoy reading other’s blogs when I find the time….
But I want to have full attention to focus on my children as much as possible. I don’t want them to become blog orphans.
1 response so far ↓
1 Katherine // Jan 16, 2004 at 11:10 pm
We love the “airport” wireless network in our house – David and I frequently sit in bed next to each other and use our separate laptops but “together.” We can even use them out in the yard, front or back, with the network and still be online.