I was thinking about divorce yesterday. First, while driving in the morning, I heard a clip on NPR’s Day to Day about Our Family Wizard. I’m not sure that only divorced families need to use this software – it seems handy for communicating and setting up a calendar that all can share, parents and children. But this particular program was emphasizing how it can help divorced parents work out tensions through the Web rather than in person or on the phone. The claim was made that families who use Our Family Wizard are happier. From the site:
It is our hope that OFW will give children of divorced and separated parents a better chance to live with less conflict.We know shared parenting is not easy. You can use this site to minimize stress from verbal communication and to work out differences for your children’s sake.
As I was driving, I started to think about how this could have helped my family. It would be better if this product wasn’t necessary in the first place, if people didn’t get divorced. But if it has to happen, better to have some good tools and resources available to minimize the stress.
When I got home, I read how Halley Suitt described being divorced:
We had an accident. We all got injured. I try to understand what happened, was there something I could have done at the last minute, some way to drive the car of my marriage more expertly to avert the whole thing, but I think not.
I appreciate her honesty, how she shared her feelings, and my own feelings range from sorrow to empathy to relief as I read her piece. Her accident analogy reminded me all-too-much of the piece I wrote last month Twenty five years ago
Twenty five years ago this weekend, something painful happened to my family. As if all of us were in a gigantic car accident. A huge collision.
I wish that there was a Family Wizard, a magical Merlin who could conjure up cures for families: fix every ill and address all dysfunction with a spell or potion, a wave of a wand providing instant solutions to our souls.
Godspeed healing to you and your family, Halley. Peace to you all.
