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How to determine whether your family is ready for a road trip

August 15th, 2004 · 5 Comments

    Here are 15 (scientifically-proven!) ways to determine whether your family is ready for a road trip:

    roadtrip.jpg

  1. You can satsify the equation V > S
    where V = volume of vehicle to be taken on the road trip
    and S = the size of the subset of wordly possessions required for the trip, including diapers, necessary stuffed animals, canned caffeinated beverages, toothbrushes and clean socks.

  2. You believe suitcase style is hip and that rumpled = beautiful.. Who needs irons anyway? Or showers and shampoo…
  3. One of your favorite party games is gas tank limbo: how low can you go?!
  4. At least one or more members of your family is a young reader who will notice the speed limit signs and inquire Are you driving 65? Every family needs at least one backseat driver and amateur state patrol officer to monitor the vehicle velocity and exclaim over the show of flashing lights visible from the rear window.
  5. You and your family like the adventures of figuring out how to use a variety of plumbing fixtures, a new one at each stop, installed with creativity.
  6. Listening to the kids’ favorite Silly Songs for twelve hours straight is your idea of a fun time. After all at the end of the trip, you’ll be happy to get your own name straight, nevermind John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt’s…And hearing thirty-two repeats of Dry Bones only reminds the parents that.. the backbone connects to the neck bone…the neck bone connects to the headache….
  7. Your conscience doesn’t object to the thought that hundreds, thousands, of insects will meet an abrupt and untimely end on the front of your automobile.
  8. Your conscience doesn’t object to the thought that your vehicle will consume gallons and gallons of gasoline on its trip down the highway.

    nuggets.jpg

  9. You think ketchup is a vegetable.
  10. You think ketchup is a fashion accessory.
  11. You think ketchup is a great perfume.
  12. The thought of biting into chicken bites at lunch and dinner for two days only increases your appetite. It’s a good time to go on a diet: the Whatever-I-Can-Stomach-Today-At-Burger-King-Diet

    chixbites.jpg

  13. Fighting with those you love is something you can handle. Especially when one of you likes the (false?!) assurance of printing out mapquest directions for the (13+) legs of the journey while the other would rather use a map and wing it a bit. (guess who was which?!) Compromise is something you can do for the sake of sanity. We once read a book whose authors claimed that those couples who went camping had the strongest marriages. Going on a road trip is simply another version of roughing it and seeing how your relationship likes the sandpaper…
  14. You are willing to see new perspectives of yourself, the ones you love and the land where you live and drive.
  15. You think your spouse is pretty cute and the thought of looking at him in his sunglasses and conversing together, sharing the road as a team for hours and hours of freeway ribbon sounds like fun.

    tedglasses.jpg

Tags: family

5 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Ted Leung on the air // Aug 15, 2004 at 11:58 pm

    Our roadtrip experience

    Last night we got back from our summer roadtrip. OSAF and its sister organizations had a summer picnic last weekend, so we arranged for my regular visit to OSAF to coincide with the picnic. Since this was a family picnic, Julie and I decided that w

  • 2 Ted Leung on the air // Aug 16, 2004 at 12:07 am

    Our roadtrip experience

    Last night we got back from our summer roadtrip. OSAF and its sister organizations had a summer picnic last weekend, so we arranged for my regular visit to OSAF to coincide with the picnic. Since this was a family picnic, Julie and I decided that w

  • 3 Janelle // Aug 16, 2004 at 11:30 am

    This will come in handy as we are planning a road trip very soon…the only problem is that I have a VERY small car! We may want to reconsider renting a car…

  • 4 Julie // Aug 16, 2004 at 10:13 pm

    Ah, Janelle, I hope you realize I wrote it a bit tongue in cheeky 🙂 I do not believe ketchup is a vegetable….

    But I do hope you have a great road trip …

  • 5 Katherine // Aug 19, 2004 at 8:53 am

    This was very smile-producing, Julie! It was great to see you. We just got back from our trip, mostly air travel, but with about 5 1/2 hours of driving too, spread over two days. I have a very similar photo of my husband at the wheel, in bison country in Colorado 🙂