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I need to say no

March 25th, 2004 · No Comments

Last week Fran described her state of mind when she writes:

I need absolute quiet and privacy.

I understand. I am guilty of staying up too late at night in order to grab that precious quiet and privacy(note post times!). I used to try to savor it in the morning but lately I’ve swung more towards my nocturnal husband’s tendencies. There’s something about time to myself that I treasure. Even more than sleep.

What I love about the blog world is that it’s a constant party. But what I have to fight sometimes is that it is constant conversation. If I have the radio on too long, or if people are talking all the time around me, it becomes background noise that irritates me. After a while, all I want is quiet.

I find that blogging can be like background noise for me. The reading and writing of blogs takes up a few burners in my brain, even if its simply simmering for a while on the stove. I’ll read posts that will start something stirring inside me. The way I work with words, I’ll find sentences and ideas floating into my mind minutes or hours later. It can become a big distraction. I find I need a notebook and pen near me to capture what’s coming. Otherwise it gets lost in the moment.

Blogging can be dangerous and addictive. Like the Lay’s potato chip slogan: “you can’t eat just one”. If I want, I can go surfing, find new blogs and click through posts. I do like to go on adventures. I like to find new friends and writers. And in blogging one can go from link to link the way Amazon monkeys swing through the rainforest.

What I’m realizing is that not all parties go all night. Sometimes I need quiet. Away from the computer. Time apart from my blog. I need to say no. I need to end conversations or figure out how to put them on “pause” in my brain. Turn off the heat and take the pots off the stove. Sometimes I have to stop.

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